Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
