we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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