On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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