..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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