At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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