No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
