You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
