dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
