I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
it's great music for shaving your balls
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize