I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
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