So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
