I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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