So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
