The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
