Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
