she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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