How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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