I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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