if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
