very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
