i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
