Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
