Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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