This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
