question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
