KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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