found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
