as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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