i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
