Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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