how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
