Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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