omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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