Her vagina should come with caution tape.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
