I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Randomize