I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
