i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize