Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
He passed out mid-signature
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
