You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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