I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize