i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
that's an acceptable place to lick
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Randomize
