I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
