You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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