yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
