aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
