While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
