just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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