I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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