Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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