And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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