i'm signing you up for texting rehab
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize